Warm Fuzzies

As you may or may not know, Matt and I are very involved in children's ministries in our church.
Matt leads the junior class and pathfinders. I float and cover for Kindergarten and Cradle Roll when the need arises and help lead Adventurers. Until this year, we were VBS directors.
We love being involved with the kids.
Today, a family gave us a card and a little gift (ok it was a big gift..one I am still shocked about) and thanked us for being such a good influence on their kids and that they appreciate us and all that we do.
Wow. Someone cares about what we do.
It makes us feel good!

I need more..

hours in the day? days in the week? Something. I need more time. Don't we all though?
This week I dropped my Bible study. I just couldn't do it anymore. I have something going on almost every night of the week, and it was just too much.
But now, I want to add weight watchers. What a foolish idea. If I don't have time for Bible study, how will I have time for WW? Here's my plan. There is a meeting on Tuesday at 6. I have another meeting at church at 7. Maybe I can just do both, and not see Matt much that night. Ugh, I just don't know.
School is going really, really well these days. It is taking us a lot longer than it used to, but it's going well. We've decided to go four months before taking a break, instead of three. Because our first month back would be May, and we'll be gone for two weeks in May.
Once again, I feel like I have much rumbling around in my brain, but just not getting onto the screen well. Oh well.
Emily may have turned another corner. She has had a hard time, which has been hard on me. She was crying all the time again, and that just gets really, really tiring. But they doubled her reflux meds and she finally seems to be doing better. It's only been two days so I hope I'm not jumping the gun. Time will tell!
Thanks for hanging in with me when I disappear for these long periods, I'm just running out of time!

I just really don't want to do anything

I'm tired.
I don't know why. I'm just pooped.
I have things I need to be doing (History lesson with the boys anyone?), and I just don't want to.
I started out today being revved and ready to take on the world. I have no idea where that feeling went. Instead, now I just want to curl up and take a nap.
In Emily news, I hadn't told ya'll that her reflux has been giving her troubles again. And it has been so difficult. The constant crying. The constant nursing. The constant crying.
Took her to the doctor today, fully expecting to be blown off. Last time we were there, the doc said that it wasn't normal for someone her age to still have reflux and if we were still having problems at 2 it was off to the gastro doc we go. So I was just expecting a referral to the gastro, but instead I got an increase in her current meds. We go back in 2 weeks to check the progress. But can I say, "HALLELUJAH!!" Hopefully, this will help things and we can have our happy girl back.
OK, I'm done procrastinating, sort of. I must go teach those kids something from the past. I'm not entirely sure what today's lesson is, but I shall see soon enough.
Oh, and totally unrelated to anything (because that seems to be the theme of this post!) Matt is going backpacking with a bunch of guys from church this weekend. They are going far away, almost to Mexico. I am hoping that he doesn't freeze, cause that would just make me sad.
Keeping up the randomness..how about some pictures?
The kids worked on a cake decorating honor for Pathfinders. Their cakes.





Oh and here's Emily from the Mended Little Hearts Christmas party!

You're not my brother

Overheard the other day.....


Collin, "Zachy you're not my brother, Matthew is"

Zachy, "I am too your brother!"

Collin, "No Zachy, Dillon is your brother. Matthew and me were born with glasses and you and Dillon weren't, so Matthew is my brother and Dillon is yours"

The things these kids think about!

Little Piggies

Yesterday was January 24. Emily will be two on March 3.
I have longed for her hair to grow so I could do something with it. It is growing mullet style. The back is getting quite long. Sides, not so much.
But yesterday...lookie what happened!!


After I put them in, she froze. She wouldn't move from this spot. But then the boys started telling her she was so cute and she finally moved. She kept them in the rest of the day. Of course they fell out a couple times, but she stood still for me to put them back in.



Matt had gone to church early, you should have seen the look on his face when he saw her for the first time! I think he was as excited as me!!



As usual, kids had to pile into a picture with her. And how cute is she, resting her head on Collin's??



As a total aside, the other day we were at the park. I had my camera. Emmie was so funny, she would go somewhere..stop...wait for me to take a picture then move on.

In the market for a new stroller

We are in the market for a stroller.
We know we will have a ton of walking to do at Disney World, and we know that Zachy will not make it.
I think even without his stamina issues he'd have a hard time, but throw in the stamina issues and it's a given.
His activity level is much better these days, but his stamina is still lower than what I would expect.
I find it interesting. I've been conversing with another mom whose son is paced and she says her son also has lower stamina. Her doctor, like ours, seems to think there should be no reason for this. We are beginning to wonder if that is what they say when they don't know. I'm starting to think that he will never been quite as energetic as his counterparts, but that's ok. It is only times like now that it is even an issue.
At any rate, we should be able to get a special pass that will allow us to take a stroller in line with us, making it so we don't have to lug him when he wears out.
So we are looking for a compact stroller, but one that is big enough to hold him.
I don't want to go special needs simply because they are really expensive.
We are currently thinking about a MacLaren stroller and wonder if anyone has experience with them. They are a bit spendy, but I'm thinking it would be quite worth it.
Please let me know if you have any input...if you've never commented..now is the time to do so..I need help!

The Monkey Family Olympics

Last week, the kids learned about the first olympics in Greece.
They learned that the men participated alone, which was good since they competed in the nude.
Can you imagine this? The first olympics consisted of relay races, discuss throwing, high jumps, and javelin throws. In the nude. That's crazy.
So we set out on Sunday to have our own olympic games. Only we were fully clothed.
We went to a park where we had a javelin throw(we used old bamboo tiki torch holders), a discuss throw (frisbee), a relay race (we used sinking water rings), and a long jump.
It was lots of fun, and we decided everyone tied. The prize was a crown (the same sinking water rings) and a whole bunch of fun!
We then piled into the great white to head to Babies R Us. We are in the market for a new stroller. We need something big enough for Zachy at DisneyWorld.
When we pulled Emmie out of the van, we noticed an ant.
I took her into the bathroom and stripped her down. Sixteen stupid fire ant bites all over her torso and arms, and one on her face. The poor thing! She never cried though. What a tough kid.
I'm ending this abruptly because my beloved just got home bringing me flowers. Awww, what a guy!!

One year ago today..

My baby got his first pacemaker.
Our lives changed forever, and yet, not so much.
Zachy's still a normal 5 year old kid.
Sure, we have to be more careful about what he does, and he has a lifetime of surgeries to look forward to, but he is healthy, happy, and normal.
Whatever that is.
I hate that this is part of our lives, but oh so thankful that Zachy is ours and we get to keep him here with us.
I love that boy so much, and am thankful for all the medical advancements that have happened to allow him to live!
We are just so very thankful.

Some people think I'm crazy!

OK, probably a lot of people think I'm crazy. That's ok..I probably am. At least that's what Matt tells me!
Last summer, remember when I was doing all my sewing? Did I ever tell y'all that I was making jammie pants for everyone? I ended up making fourteen pairs of pants for various family members and friends.
I made some for Matthew's best friend, Leanne (for her birthday). Well, Leanne's sister, Clarissa (Dillon's best friend coincidentally) wanted some too. So I said I'd make some for her birthday. Which was yesterday.
So as I was deciding what fabric to use, I found Disney fabrics. So of course I had the brilliant idea to make my kids jammie pants to take to Disney World.
My sister thinks I'm nuts. Matt just thinks I'm me. I don't see anything strange about it at all. Neither did the lady in the fabric department last night. In fact, she thought I was brilliant! I need to get to know that lady!
Anyway, now I need to be cleaning, but I want to be sewing. I know I have to get Clarissa's pants done today to take to her at church tomorrow, but other than that, they can wait.
I just say there can never be enough Disney!!

Hip Hip Hooray!

Matthew had an appointment with the glaucoma doc this morning. His pressure was down! HOORAY!!!
This is such great news. Last med we tried just kind of fizzled out, and it looked like this was going to also. But no! It's still working!
We get six months until the next trip back to see him.
The only downer of the appointment was that Matthew used to be able to make out how many fingers someone was holding up using his right eye. He can no longer do that. He could see the tech's hand waving, but couldn't make anything out. The doc says his eye is very damaged.
In six months they are going to try to do some sort of scan, and if I understand correctly it is to be able to keep track of the damage a bit better. Please correct me if I'm wrong, Papa.
But hooray! The pressure is down and he relatively pain free these days! WOOT!!

How did I survive all of this??

I've been tripping down memory lane, and got to thinking about when Matthew was first born.
The year was 1996, and I was mere 20 years old. We were surprised to find out he had a cleft nose, and later to discover he had a cataract in his right eye.
We were poor. Very poor. Matt worked 3 jobs for quite awhile to make ends meet for us. I had always planned on going back to work after Matthew was born (somehow I didn't know how much daycare cost!) but that would prove impossible, as you will see. This memory simply involves traveling. What it leaves out is the hard time we had with drops, and the terrible things that came with a baby wearing a contact. The good thing I will never forget about this time is how wonderful our family friend and optician, Gary, was to us. I owe that man so much, and will never be able to repay him for all he did for us. I remember many, many times, being in his office, him trying to get a contact in little Matthew's eye. He would always be wearing a sweater, it seems like. It wouldn't take long before he was stripping it off and working in a cooler shirt. He would be sweating up a storm. It was NOT easy, by any stretch of the imagination.
But again..this is about traveling, not those things.

Matthew's eye doctor was a 6 hour drive away. He started seeing him at 2 weeks old. Had his first surgery at one month old. After that, he wore a contact lens in his right eye because they had removed his lens during the first surgery. During his first two years, he would go on to have four more surgeries on his eye.
During the first year, while he wore his contact, we had to go to the doctor every two-three weeks. Well, we were poor and couldn't afford for Matt to take off. We had one car then, so Matt would arrange for people to take him to and from his jobs.
I would drive me and Matthew up there the day before the appointment, spend the night, and come home the next day after his appointment. Sometimes, he would have several appointments with different doctors. On those trips we'd have to stay the night a second night. Many of the appointments were sedated, so that would add another level to it. If they weren't sedated, they would wrap him in a blanket on a papoose board, then use a tiny little speculum to hold his eyelids open while he screamed. These were awful, awful times for me.
OK, so what is crazy to me is...we didn't even have cell phones back then! I would have to wait till I got home, or till that night to be able to call Matt, using a calling card, to tell him what transpired! Often, if I got bad news, I would call my mother-in-law from the hospital pay phone, collect,to tell SOMEONE what had happened.
Also crazy to me is that we toyed with the idea of getting a CB radio. A CB!!! CRAZY!! But there was a mountain pass I had to go over and in the winter it was white knuckle driving. The only reason we didn't get a CB was because we couldn't afford it.
Luckily, Matt was able to be with us for those first surgeries, but nothing else because we just couldn't afford it.
Apropos to nothing, Matthew started having his nose reconstructed when he was 6. He has had 3 surgeries to date on it, Matt has been there for one. The first one, he was in Spain. He was due to be home, but they changed the orders on us, so he was in Spain. The second, he was there for, and the third he was in school, I think it was probably finals week or something. Or else, as usual, we couldn't afford for him to take off from work and pay for a trip.
Somehow, I have managed to do all of this, and survive it! Through the years I have seen more medical procedures done on my children than I thought possible. And I have been there for every one. Holding that sweet child after the procedure.
I don't know how I managed to survive through the early years with Matthew. God was definitely watching out for us.
If I've learned anything through the years, it is that while I may feel weak, I am strong.
I AM A SURVIVOR!

I am so boring!

I know I've been sparse around these parts, I just have nothing to say.
We've started back to school for a couple weeks now and it's been..well..rough. I don't know why. Maybe wintertime blues. Who knows. But no one, including me, is into it yet. Hopefully, soon, we'll be back in the swing of things. Otherwise, one of us might lose their minds!
I also started a weight loss support group at church. Because, you know, I can never have enough to do! I lost a couple pounds last week, which is better than nothing, but dang is it hard work. I did really well until the weekend hit. I just really do not know how to get through the weekends with Matt here. Will power is not my forte and he likes to eat! I did order a Richard Simmons video though to help with that. Hey...don't laugh! I love me some Richard!! Plus, they are relatively easy and I am in horrible shape! Anyway, I can't wait to get it.
I don't quite know why I'm even writing. I have nothing at all to say. Oh hey, how about this..I'll share a code with you!!
Until January 20, you can get a photobook from Hoorray.com for just shipping. Even their most expensive ones. Well, up to the $35 one. I have to say, Shutterfly is MUCH easier to use, but you can't beat the price! The code you enter is bzzalbum. I hope someone gets to use this! I just ordered mine last night, and am looking forward to receiving it!
OK that's it. Nothing else to say. Boring I am!!

The Kingdom calls!

We've made our reservations and will be arriving at the Magic Kingdom on May 2. We will stay 12 days and visit the parks for 10 of those days. All this made possible by the awesomeness of being military. If you are military and don't know, right now you can get 40% Disney resort rooms. And free 5 day passes for the active member with companion tickets for $99 each. If you aren't military they are doing a buy 4 nights get 3 free deal.
I have spent countless hours researching our options and planning this trip. Last night it hit me.
There is a bigger Kingdom calling me. A better Kingdom. And I need to be spending as much time researching It as I have been researching the Magic Kingdom.
Paul told the Corinths that they had been given all the tools they need while they eagerly await the return of Jesus.*
Friends, we have those tools. We have all we need to get to the Kingdom, but we have to spend time in the Word. We need to eagerly be waiting for the return of Jesus, and our trip to the Kingdom.
I know it is so much easier to focus on going to the magic kingdom because it is sooner (maybe!). But I must keep my eyes turned heavenward. I must have the Kingdom in the front of my mind. I must focus on the Heavenly Kingdom.

*1 Corinthians 1-4.

School starts tomorrow

Just a little fun to start your year off right!

Oh the fun we have!

We are home safely. We had a totally uneventful drive. And a good vacation.
We spent the first half in a town just west of Dallas where we did lots of fun Christmasy stuff and spent lots of time in the pool and hot tub. Oh how I miss the hot tub! I think I may need one!
The second half was spent in Missouri with Matt's brother and sister-in-law and their kids. Good times were had by all. The adventure there happened when their heat went out. It was out nearly the entire time we were there. Gina blames me, rightfully so I suppose. Before going to visit she had told me it was very cold in Missouri. I joked about us not being able to go up there, and asked her how their heat was. She told me it was just fine, and to quit being such a wuss. We get there, the heat goes out. Clearly, my fault. Although, perhaps she was just trying to toughen me up, and perhaps the heat wasn't out at all. It was one big joke. OK, not really, I saw the heating men there with my own two eyes, so it must have been legit.
We baked lots of cookies and ate way too much, but it was fun.
We arrived home on Friday night. That's when the adventure began!
The kids had slept a lot on the way home, so of course they were all wide awake when we got home.
Because everyone went to bed so late, we were late getting to church. It was my week to work in the kitchen, and Matt was leading the song service. He had asked Matthew to watch Emmie while we did our duties. Emmie was spinning in a chair and fell off and hit her face on a metal folding chair. She knocked two of her capped teeth out of alignment. There was blood everywhere and she was screaming bloody murder. We raced home to call the dentist. After talking with her, we decided there wasn't anything more that could be done, but that we would go in for x-rays today.
She has swelled a bit and I noticed her nose was out of alignment now.
The x-rays revealed that her root was fractured and also the bone that holds the teeth has a hairline fracture in it. Nothing can be done, and it's just a waiting game to see if the teeth die. If they die they will have to pull them, so we are praying hard that they stay alive.
Today the teeth are still loose, so we know she hit pretty hard. Thankfully though, she has caps. They told me if the caps weren't there her teeth would have broken right off at the gums.
I think I have been more worried about this than I realized because tonight I am absolutely beat. Not sleepy, just physically exhausted.
Collin had an ophthalmology appointment today and they discovered he is seeing 20/30 corrected now. So that is great. The other doc had said his eyes had gotten worse, but today they said no. YIPPEE!!
Tomorrow night we are having an agape feast at church and I'm apparently in charge of it. Didn't realize that till today, so it's been last minute rushing about to get things done.
I think I need another vacation!!

What has happened to the Monkey's??

So after my last entry we all proceeded to get sick. It hasn't been fun in these parts.
It's starts out innocent enough...just a cough. You don't even feel bad, you just cough. And it's lovely, you cough up phlegm. But alas, you just cough.
But then, oh my lands, it hits you. And it plows you down like the snow plows that are undoubtedly plowing in other parts of the country.
It comes with a nice high fever (104 in my kids) and aches and pains. And sleepless nights because of the endless hacking.
And. if you are particularly lucky, it all changes into pneumonia like it did for poor Zachy.
The very worst part of all of this is that we are leaving tomorrow for vacation. Friends, the Monkey Family never goes on vacation, and we were so looking forward to this break from reality.
But, we will forge on. We will pack our family up along with a plethora of cough meds and antibiotics and throat lozenges. We will brave this illness and be determined to have a good time. And we will SUCCEED!!
I think this may be possible because I think we are all on the downhill side of this. Everyone except Matt, who is just coming into it. Poor thing.
While I'm forcing us to have a good time, I won't have computer access. We are old school folk who don't have a laptop. But I want to take this opportunity to wish every one of you a very, merry Christmas. I hope you all enjoy your families this year and please don't forget the reason for the season. Our wonderful savior, Jesus Christ. May God richly bless you this season.
I'll see you on the flip side!

This is me, at 33.

Yesterday was my birthday! I'm thirty-three now. And it seems a significant number. You only get those doubles every eleven years. This coming year will be special for Dillon since it will be his first ever double!
At any rate, I've decided, this is the year I vow to truly love me.
I looked in the mirror the other day, and I saw something unfamiliar.
I saw stretch marks that are the reward for the five biggest accomplishments of my life.
I saw saggy breasts that sag from years of not only nourishing, but comforting those five children I love so much.
I saw extra pounds packed on during the most stressful of times. Made stressful simply because I love these people so deeply. To watch others go through what my kids go through wouldn't affect me nearly as much.
I saw dark circles under my eyes. They were the result of little sleep. I had been up the night before nursing a sick Emily. They spoke of love to me.
The very best thing I saw was wrinkled creases at my eyes. Crows feet. But guess what. When I frowned and made a face I might make while crying, they weren't there. In fact, there were no wrinkles there. However, when I smiled, and laughed, they were. This is proof to me that my life is much more about laughter and smiles than about frowns and sorrow.
I looked deeper. I saw a heart that should be burst right open. I can't describe how much love is bursting out of my heart. Both my love for others, and their love for me. I must be the luckiest person alive!
I saw compassion. I saw a person able to empathize with many in a way most people cannot. Not because I'm so much better, but because I've been there.
I saw a mature woman.
My mom said this would happen when I turned thirty, but no. It's happening now.
I'm learning that I don't have to be perfect. I don't have to look perfect. Those that matter love me no matter what. And I'm so glad.
Yes, this is my year. I may not lose all this weight. I may not be the perfect mom. I may not be the perfect wife.
But I will be me. And I will love me.

Six Flags Sunday Night

This is the only decent shot we got with Santa. Em, of course, would have nothing to do with him, but the boys..even Matthew...all sat on his lap!



The hot cocoa was a bit too hot, so Matt just gave Emmie the lid with the whipped cream on it. That's the best part anyway!



Dillon was impossible to get shots of that night.



This is a horribly fuzzy picture, but it is Zachy going down the sledding hill. You should have seen how thrilled the kids were. It's the only snow any southern Texan kids see, and they thought it was the greatest thing ever!



Matthew wanted to take Emmie on all the rides with him. This is them on the giant ferris wheel. Of course, Matt was with them, and I was in another bucket with the other three kids.



I have a bunch of pictures of Emmie and Matt that look just like this. For some reason, she thought it was great fun to look at him like that!



Self portrait of me and Collin.



This is my favorite picture of the night. It is the perfect visual for how Emily has been lately. So very, very happy.

Does this make me a hypocrite?

Thursday, Collin had an appointment that brought us to the base.
We were having ice cream at the BX when I noticed our surroundings.
We are at a training base, and every week there is a graduation from Basic Training. Families normally arrive for this on Wednesday or Thursday. Graduation is Saturday.
We were surrounded by young men, and their parents. And suddenly, I was very afraid.
"Do any of you want to join the air force when you grow up?" I asked timidly.
"ME! I do!" Dillon exclaimed excitedly.
My heart sank.
Not my boy. He can't join the military!
OK, now here's the kicker. I love the military. I love what it has done for my family. We are so much better off being a military family than we would be if we were just plain civilians. BUT. Isn't there always a 'but'??
BUT...Matt isn't deployable. And, he isn't my child! (Sorry Anna!)
I really don't make a great military wife. I would be really upset if Matt had to go to war.
Currently, Dillon and Emily are the only two children who could even join the military in our family (which I'm secretly glad about!), and it could be a huge help to them, like it was to us.
But, that doesn't change the fact that they are my babies!
Matt thinks it would be great, and can picture the day we would be back in San Antonio with Dillon for graduation, but me, I'm not so sure.
I mean..look at that innocent little face!

Something wonderful happened last week.

I have no idea what it was, but something happened.
Could it be a new and budding (finally) vocabulary? I don't know, but Emmie went from being so very whiney and demanding to being a sweet, silly, happy girl.
It is so wierd.
She has been sooo difficult all her life, and now just suddenly, she seems content.
I thought maybe it was all the company and the non stop attention, but even with them gone she is so sweet.
She's using new words all the time, and I think that helps a lot. But it seems like so much more than that.
She's just content. And it is so very, very wonderful!